I am fading away

3/6/08-19/11/10

2010-11-19T13:11:00.002+08:00

After 2years 4months 16days, I am finally saying goodbye to faddingindarkness and moving to zoophiliac. Sad but true, but I am also saying goodbye to all the things that I do not want to be related to. Yes, this blog has been a means of connecting between many of us. But i suppose as we graduate, I really want to get rid of some people, because I want to start life fresh and with the people who are sincere. Hope you get what I mean. Haha.

So I had no choice but to change it altogether. This new blog is going to be about the brighter side of my life that I might have not fully recognized all these years. The COLORS of my life.

I was looking at my past posts. Geez.. I realized how much I have changed-Im glad its all for the better and I believe God has brightened it up by showing me my weaknesses, strengths, loves as well as people I should forget! Like from "I LOVE PAUL TWOHILL-I LOVE CLICK 5-I LOVE MCR-I LOVE JUSTIN!!" haha, its a total new genre. Yep, similarly, my life has changed Genre.

Faddingindarkness has been part of my life and geez, I will miss you so much ok! Thank you for being there with me and always supporting me, no matter what the circumstances was! You are a chapter of my life I won't forget.

And now for the new blog!! *YAY* This is the new URL www.zoophiliac.blogspot.com Nice eh! I love the word ZOOPHILIAC. Basically it means loving others for who they are. Yep! That's what we are all going to do, because that was the most important thing I learnt through these years! SO friends, family and everyone, LETS PERK UP ZOOPHILIAC!!!!

The thread..

2010-09-25T01:10:00.004+08:00

Today I'm missing someone-not very close to me, but I just miss him lots...

Many times, even this second. I just feel that life is nothing and has no meaning. The feeling like why am I here? I always ask myself, WHAT IS MY PURPOSE IN LIFE? and i guess I haven't found the real answer. The sight of life just gets me tongue tied.. No interest in it and it is just something so mundane.

And I saw what you went through, I saw what other people who wants their life go through. I look at how people fight, struggle and want their life despite that little energy and hope left. Results, yes important! But look, why is a piece of paper controlling us? Isn't it suppose to be the process of that piece of paper that matters?

You know guys, life is unpredictable. It brings you on a boat ride and it shakes and wobbles and threats you badly when the storm comes by. But are you going to sit there and just let it off without trying? I mean afterall, you have been living for so long right? Just a little bit more? Pls..pull through this with me will you? I know many of you are sad, disappointed, hopeless... But can we do this, together? Can we?

Treasure those with you. Everyday matters. Every minute counts. Every second impacts. What is the point of hurting your enemy? Arent they the ones you make you stronger? You are suppose to thank them!!! Tell those around you how much you love them. (come on! Its just love!! A humane thing. SAY IT!) Tell your friends you love them. Make them smile :)

because once its gone...don't cry...don't regret...don't subject to it....

loves <3>

hey there!

2010-09-17T14:57:00.003+08:00

HELLO world!

How are you doing? How you guys hanging there?

Well I have been hooked up with lots of work lately. Erm.. OLevels around the corner and all. I will just give it my best shot ok :) You guys too, just do your best :)

OH! I have been having this craving for the beach..Or should i say a day in the beach? haha either way its just fun. I love going to the beach so much. Do you see what I see? Well, its just so peaceful there. Seeing the way the waves crash onto the shore and the birds fly high and the sun at its horizon. Since I was young I have this interest in just starring in the sea. Mummy said when I was young I would smile to the water and then laugh. haha. its so pretty you know :)

Take a short break and refresh yourself! Im going to the beach to relax myself.

Take care ok? And keep SMILING :)

Yousmile.
Ismile.

Prasana :)

vampire SUCK

2010-09-17T14:48:00.003+08:00

YOu SHouLd WaTch tHis! ITs gOnnA makE yoU lAuGH soO mUch!!!

whats new pras?

2010-09-17T14:45:00.003+08:00

I have this sudden urge to spend a day at the beach!

I have this sudden obsession over Megan Fox!

I have this sudden love to just smile at the scariest things!

I have this sudden urge to skip my tuitions!

I have this sudden mindset that life is indeed interesting!

I have this sudden circle of people who is why I am here!

This sudden Want to say-

I LOVE YOU ALL :)

2010-09-17T14:39:00.002+08:00

Wind whines and whines the shingle,
The crazy pierstakes groan;
A senile sea numbers each single
Slimesilvered stone.

From whining wind and colder
Grey sea I wrap him warm
And touch his trembling fineboned shoulder
And boyish arm.

Around us fear, descending
Darkness of fear above
And in my heart how deep unending
Ache of love!

OLevels

2010-08-27T23:48:00.001+08:00

58		days
1400		hours
84012		minutes
5040747		seconds

From the inner-self

2010-08-26T22:44:00.004+08:00

I guess.....

yes, I have officially lost my hopes, feelings and good times I had with you. I do not know if that is just a blessing in disguise or a sweet curse? Either way, I gained pretty much from it.

yes, we were best mates in the group. But that was just the past. Now that you have found your new place, I hope you are happy there.

yes, i might have been a little indecisive. But you were not there to help me right? So don't blame it all on me. We are all growing up, finding our identity. I do not expect you to understand this now. But the time will come, I believe it will.

yes, you might have disappointed me a lot. You might have made me feel really sad. But i still love you like i always do. I believe time will cool us down. But today, now, this very moment, I am here, new and clear. I know what I want, what I need and most importantly who I need.

Stay happy always

Loves

MISSING YOU!

2010-08-26T22:41:00.002+08:00

THE CLICK FIVE have been in town lately. The most painful part is that I didnt have a chance to meet them. Thanks to my Ultra busy schdule! DARN IT! Well, they have got new songs coming their way and their album will be realeased early next year! Also, they said that they are planning to stay here in singapore for another 12 months!!! Geez this cant get any better! So come along with me to meet click five soon after O's ok! Many plans after O's!!!

Until then, this is the NEW click five

Essence of life

2010-08-26T22:33:00.003+08:00

HELLO!!!

Hey, Im back. I dont have to say sorry this time ya? You guys should know that I have been really busy preparing for my OLevels. Well, I just missed faddingindarkness a lot. But today, the feeling I have is totally different from what it was when I posted my last post(10thAug10). I have been changing quite a bit. I feel really different and I'm loving it because I feel that I am more aware about the happenings.

Who to trust.How to make choices.How to prioritize.Making new friends.Understanding people.Accepting everyone for who they are.Laughing a lot even when Stress knocks on me. and the list goes on and on and on....

Today, I am ready to make choices for my life. In another 59 days, my friends and I will be doing our very last exam in Secondary School. After that, we will all be moving on. This is just so awesome. Seeing everyone growing is the best essence of life.

Live life. Love life.

Prasana, for you !

Be the champion

2010-08-26T22:30:00.002+08:00

Everything starts out slow, steady,manageable

Soon after, the pace is elevated

Everything is different

Meeting new people everyday

Meeting new obstacles

Meeting new emotional setbacks to deal with

The Winner gets out just by winning

But The Champion gets out FEARLESS

Letter from my angel

2010-08-10T22:42:00.002+08:00

Denise Chan August 10 at 2:34pm

Don't Quit

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow--
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than,
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor's cup,
And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out--
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

- Author unknown

This is what Ms Chan told me in one of the messages she replied me. I will keep it in my mind always. Ms Chan i promise i will preserve.

2010-08-06T17:22:00.001+08:00

There's no real love in you

But why do I keep loving you?

BieberFever

2010-08-06T17:06:00.001+08:00

I laughed a lot watching this. Bieber fans, you should because laughing is real good, especially when you get good laughs :)

As we go on

2010-08-06T16:45:00.002+08:00

Finally, I get to use the comp without time constrain. Humph..A lot has been happening lately.

Like:

-Prasana has been sleeping for 3 hrs!

-Vivian has found this another hot guy she likes

-Realized the school is such a nice place at night

-Making lots of new friends along the way of problems

-Realizing that she is just so lame. (perhaps she is not 16 yet, that's why-BE UNDERSTANDING!)

-ULCER ULCER ULCER

-Managing changes in life pretty well

-Singapore is turning 45

-AND I'M CANCER FREE!!!

well, if you guys wanna know anything in dept about what I've stated above, ask me personally OK. Because I really dun want to talk about the past.

Perhaps we can start cheering through this long holiday. I'm going to get out of this school in 3 months! And make more friends where ever I go. Probably we can cheer for that too!! humph..I'll miss my friends though and most importantly her...

BUT

Its a CHOICE right prasana??? So I'm going to work so closely with Prasana and defeat anything or anyone that comes on my way. Wanna try??? BRING IT ON BABY!!! (woots. I'm just so highhh today....perhaps the GARLIC made a hell lot of difference)

Well, I must tell you about the GARLIC since I've mentioned it. So today, after school Prasana Tw ViPek YunYue Eben went to Seoul Garden. At the counter, the lady was like, you guys only booked 1 table, so cannot have 5 people. So PTM (always so marvellous!) went to her and spoke to her. And we got our way through. Then the usual, we ate everything we wanted and anything we wanted. Eben was sausage-ing as usual.. LOL! After eating, we played the MORBID GAME ! They mixed stuff and we had to drink it if we lost. So we finished 1 entire cup.Then, I was like, "OK my turn to mix stuff"(iregrettedsayingthat..!)

Prasana's Marvelorio:

1. All drinks available

2. Jelly

3.Corn

4. Syrup

5. Ice cream

6. Salt & Pepper

7. Spaghetti Sauce

8. GARLIC!!!!!

So the garlic screwed everything else up. The taste was horrendously GROSS!!!!! Until now, the taste is stuck in my mouth and it sucks terribly... BUT we had lots of fun laughing and shouting and most importantly, forgetting about all our worries.

Had a splendid time.

HUGSnKISSES

THEY ARE BACK!!!

2010-07-31T00:25:00.000+08:00

THE CLICK FIVE: We're back, Singapore!! We'll be performing at The Celebration at Marina Bay on August 15th! This is a FREE SHOW, so no excuses! We'll see all of you there.

2010-07-29T22:28:00.004+08:00

PRASANA wants a purple hoodie!!!!

JBieber!

2010-07-29T22:24:00.002+08:00

Just a fraction of your love, fills the air

And I fall in love with you all over again

You're the light that feeds the sun in my world

So when you smile, I smile

Loves

Blowing it big together

2010-07-28T17:46:00.003+08:00

Im so confused. Seems easy to just blow it up big. Seems easy, to say everything. Seems easy to say "its me & you against the world". It seems pretty easy. BUT there is always a BUT there.. There is always something that gets me confused, something that triggers my trust, something that scares me to my nerves. Just something that bothers me so bad. I am not so good at putting it nicely in words, but I really wish I could let you read my heart. I just want everything to be back to how it started.

The times that we laughed until we cried. The times when we cried until we laugh.

xoxo

Blowing it big together

2010-07-28T17:46:00.002+08:00

Im so confused. Seems easy to just blow it up big. Seems easy, to say everything. Seems easy to saying "its me & you against the world". It seems pretty easy. BUT there is always a BUT there.. There is always something that gets me confused, something that triggers my trust, something that scares me to my nerves. Just something that bothers me so bad. I am not so good at putting it nicely in words, but I really wish I could let you read my heart. I just want everything to be back to how it started. The times that we laughed until we cried. The times when we cried until we laugh.

xoxo

Get over it

2010-07-28T17:28:00.002+08:00

Just wanted to share with you guys this video. I have been listening to this song since it was a hit until today.

It brings back lots of memories
Makes me feel stronger
and most importantly, reminds me of my identity

Hope you will enjoy it too

For my heart's delight

2010-07-24T01:04:00.003+08:00

This one is for my dearest Anthony

I know I have been so hooked up with my studies and we havent been speaking much or going out and doing things together. I am just in the situation now that my education is really important. I really hope you will understand me. 3 more months ok! And we can do anything anytime. Remember how you wanted to go on a movathon the whole day! We can do that ok! You have been with me through it all, and I am so sorry I am just not there now. But my heart, soul and love is always with you

Love you lots!

2010-07-24T01:00:00.002+08:00

Vibrance of life. 3 months more! Keep Holding On!

I just had to blog this

2010-07-24T00:56:00.002+08:00

Presenting to you the combination of the 2 best things in dreamland today-Justin BIEBER & Jacob Balck a.k.a Taylor Lautner. You guys have too see this because it is so LOL! It got me laughing with my sister while we were studying! Pls comment ok!

Live it!

2010-07-24T00:50:00.007+08:00

OH not because happiness exists,

that too hasty profit snatched from approaching loss.

But because truly being here is so much;because everything here

apparently needs us,this fleeting world,which in some strange way

keeps calling to us. Us, the most fleeting of all.

...Ah, but what can we take along

into that other realm? Not the art of looking,

which is learned so slowly, and nothing that happened here. Nothing.

The sufferings, then. And, above all, the heaviness,

and the long experience of love,-just what is wholly

unsayable

miss you when youre gone

2010-07-24T00:21:00.005+08:00

I remember sometime back mummy said this to me

"Girl, in life, many things come by us, and it just goes away like a cloud. Sometimes, you want it to stay just a little longer, sometimes you want it to move by faster. But whatever it is, everything has a purpose"

Now that is what is happening, my sweetest memories are moving away. Temporary or permanent..i dunno? But i definitely hope you would stay longer with me.

Sandra, my friend for alomst 9 years is moving to Australia. Well, she is like my soul. Part of my life, laughter, tears and anger. She was in me. I hope you be happy and safe where ever you are and do come back as often as possible ok. Now, all I am looking forward to is when you return.

God bless and love YOU so so much!

Girl,iamgoingtomissyousomuch.....

All time low

2010-07-19T16:48:00.001+08:00

MY NEW FAVOURITE BAND!!!!

HAVE BEEN LISTENING TO THEM A LOT LATELY!

THEY'RE AWESOME!!!

CRAZY PEOPLE WHO HAVE LOST THEIR MINDS!!!!

ALL TIME LOW!!!

2010-07-18T00:20:00.000+08:00

I want a Vuvuzela!

I will be there for you..

2010-07-18T00:07:00.003+08:00

We are all growing.
We are all finding our identities.
We are all finding our comfort zone.
We are all developing, learning and fighting.

Its about how you accept one another deapite their changes.
Its about how you teach each other from your experience.

This is the most vital stage of our lives.
Be a good friend, help one another be the best that they can be.
Most importantly, love one another.

take a breath with love

2010-07-17T23:31:00.004+08:00

From this speeding life, we all deserve a break

Yesterday, I went out with Cheryl and Ivan. After school, we went home, got ready and we met again at Stadium. Then, we went Ice skating. The skates were really heavy and it was kinda hard to tie them, it was my first time anyway! So dun expect much. Later, we went to the ring. WOW! I felt so nervous and noobified! The small kids were like pro at it and we were holding the edges as we ice skate. haha. But we picked it up really fast. OH YES! Prasana fall 5 times!(EPIC huh?) and Cheryl once!(sad, i didn't see!!) and ivan...lol he is cool man! He didn't fall! Perhaps because he skate before. And its really cool, how this happens. When you see someone very imbalanced, you will also feel like falling down!!!

so after that, we went to Posh and bought brownies!!!! wow they were like totally inviting! so we went to Clarke quay. We found a nice spot, and we sat there and ate the brownies. It was really really delicious, tasty, yummy, sinful, sensational! I loved it! We loved it! The night life in Clarke Quay is beautiful as ever. We took many pictures. They are all in Facebook, so do check them out and comment. Finally, we bought same Tees. It is really cool! It says Coma, instead of Puma. And it has a leopard in Coma! I bought RED, Ivan GREEN and Cheryl BROWN. Cant wait till we wear it the next time we got out. (iguessitsaftero's!)

So time was ticking, as much as we didn't want to go home, our parents were waiting for us. And I passed my Curfew of 9pm! We only left at 9.30pm! haha. It was just a simple, yet enjoyable day, we so much of memories. Didn't feel awkward or weird. It was just very natural and loved. Laughter, Clumsiness, Tiredness, Silence, Happiness - everything together. I feel so good after that day. Away from all my worries, all my left overs. I know I have to attend to it, but it was missing for that moment.

I love you guys pretty much!

& ALWAYS

and after the break, we carry on to our fast paced life..

You smile, I smile

2010-07-16T23:53:00.002+08:00

Had a great day with them! I am so tired now, I will blog tomorrow ok :)

and here we go..

2010-07-16T23:50:00.001+08:00

Well well well!

Sometimes, people just do not have the freedom of speech. That's why they result to unknown discrimination.

Anyway, it did not affect me and it wont affect me. I have better things to do in my life. Also, i dun give a damn what you said to me! Thanks to all those who have been supporting me through this and being there by my side. Lets just take this easy :)

Loves

I can do better

2010-07-15T23:28:00.000+08:00

Hello.

Well, I was watching videos from youtube and I came across this one. ILOVEIT. The way Avril explains the song just rocks! She gives me a sense of hope. She gives me that attitude!

2010-07-14T22:48:00.002+08:00

Ok this one is just for how im feeling now,again i am back to avril lavigne. She always related to me through everything i went. When i was happy,sad,regretting,angry and now when i dun give a damn!

Peace :)

2010-07-14T22:45:00.000+08:00

haha you guys should watch this, its funny! lol

after all..

2010-07-14T22:39:00.002+08:00

MY FAULT

MY FAULT

MY FAULT

yes, indeed everything was my fault.

Perhaps only you understand what im saying, but hey, do you ever know what im going through? Anyone here knows how much im suffering from the mental tortures i face? Anyone has any idea how i hate the doctor and i still have to go? Anyone has any idea how i feel when you just make things worst?

I know everyone is going through the same thing lately, but i thought we were all in this together. I though i could count on you when i feel hopeless and helpless. broken? everything is broken...

On second thoughts, fine! If that is how things are planned, then I will just go with the flow. I might not be as good for you as the others may be. But this is who I am and what I am.

Im done

2010-07-10T21:25:00.000+08:00

the walls are closing in on us..
and im wondering how?

best of both worlds

2010-07-09T16:02:00.003+08:00

I don't think many of you know about this, but I shall say it! Lately, I have been twitting and googling and youtubing a lot on these 2 girls-demi and selena. I have no idea how my whole attention got diverted to them, but I think it is for the good. They are perhaps partially the reason why I am still so string no matter what comes by. You know they have been friends since 7years old. And the best part is that they met in a Barney show! LOL. how sweet. Anyhow, its sad that they have some feuds now and they are not talking. I hope they get back together, because they look perfectly fine!

They have proven to me that a true friend does not need to be of the same personality and character as you. Instead, when you have differences, your friendship is more steady! Like, Demi is more into rock-style and selena, still living in lala land machine! haha. sweet eh? Do check them out. makes you smile :)

CHEERS

2010-07-09T15:51:00.001+08:00

SO i guess after Eclipse, you are going to hate Edward! He is so, evil! OH MY GOD! Jacob and Bella would be better, how I wish I was Stephanie! I would write it all different. Nevermind, Jake is still hot!

GO TEAM JACOB!

2010-07-09T15:48:00.001+08:00

You know you love me, I know you care :)

2010-07-09T15:39:00.000+08:00

"Have you ever felt like all hope is lost?
Being so desperate,
No matter the cost?

Then listen now,
To what I have to say,
It'll give you hope,
And might change your life today.

Look back and remember,
All the good memories forever.
Think about the people you care,
And the happy moments that you've shared.

You have to stay strong,
And give life another chance,
Know that your needed,
It could be your only defence.

Always remember that,
When things go wrong,
It's not the end of the world,
You have to stay strong."

i guess this poem did make me feel better. Hope it did you good too.

2010-07-09T15:35:00.001+08:00

This is what friendship means.Sharing the prejudice of experience, good or bad.

You and I

2010-07-09T15:26:00.003+08:00

Sometimes I just dun get it...really, seriously and honestly. Its so hard to tell you how I feel about certain things.. Its so hard to tell you how I have been trying already. Dun you see it for yourself, how I feel? Must I really say everything for you to know.. ? I thought it was a mutual understanding?...
bleh bleh bleh.

AND YOU!

Imissyou.. I really have no idea what is happening. I remembered that everything was smooth & suddenly.. Realise we only have about 4 more months? Why cant we just make the best of it and graduate as one? I think its so much better to say than to keep it to yourself. But if you insist, then its ok..if that makes you happy at least...stay cheerful, i suppose

AND ME!

I finally got my sergeant rank! YAHHHOOOO! lol. lol. just let me be happy about that ok! hahah!

AND WE!

Hahah, it was so funny today. Vi and I were talking to Ms Kok after school. It was only the 3 of us in class. Then, we were doing out English corrections. After that, we packed up and Vi locked the door.

Vi: "whose laptop is that?!"
P: "NO! its not a laptop! OH wait! Lets go in and see" and "yes it is a laptop!"

So we switched it on and we saw KOK CHUAN TIN! lol, she left the class without her laptop!! We called her and she was like, Hey ! I call you back later, I am finding my laptop! Haha, Ms Kok is so funny and CUTE! So that was for today.

weekends, pls stay long!
pretty pls.....

Idunlikeschool.

2010-06-27T11:23:00.000+08:00

SCHOOL!

2010-06-24T15:57:00.001+08:00

OOHHH!

MYYYYYY!!!

GODDDDDDDDDDD!!!!

yesterday was justin's 1st concert for his My World tour!

Go chedk out youtube, his performances were awesom!e! and im likke spamming! becuasdse i wanna be in for his performance also! yes one day im going to feature in his video! i PROMISE!

BEWARE

2010-06-22T01:23:00.001+08:00

2010-06-22T01:18:00.000+08:00

its a deal...

2010-06-22T01:10:00.002+08:00

Its MAGICAL!!! Really!

Hummmpppfff....

Its funny

Its cool

Its stupid

Its lol

Its retarded

Its pain

Its NASTY

Its Hot

Its cold

Its crazy

Its LAME!

Its weird

Its annoying

Its LOL HARDER

OMG! Im laughing! hahahahahahahhaha!

WTH! What was this post for!? LOL!

and the best is when you dun knwo why you're laughing,so you laugh harder!!!

2010-06-22T01:09:00.000+08:00

I am twitting and talking to my dearest now. Its 1.06am! and im so so tired but i just miss him so so so much. ARGH..IM COMPLAINING! Im so bored without him you know..no one to laugh with me :( bleeeh! Oh but he still irritates me all the way from New York!-such an arse!(iknowright!) Well, well, well, ! WELL! Im bored..He is also so tired, but I wonder why we are not resting..?

ILOVEYOU!

sweetest nightmare

2010-06-21T13:24:00.000+08:00

Whhoooshhh...Speechless me!

my vampire nights!

2010-06-20T03:43:00.003+08:00

i had to blog this.

I have been dreaming about RObert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner for the couple of days..

And itss kinda killing my nightdds..

their just hot and unbearable..

but crap im tiredd!

Eclipse-i bloody cant wait for it!

TAYLOR ROCKS!

and guys, let me sleep pls!

DAMMIT IT 3:46 AM!

SWEET DREAMS!

I mean, NO DREAMS!

Adulation

2010-06-16T15:14:00.001+08:00

For now, Justin makes me smile everyday no matter how down I get...

haha. Ask me about my crazy dream!

Allusive

2010-06-16T14:48:00.003+08:00

Every time I wake up from my bed, the first thing I do is countdown to the end of holidays. Why is it ending so fast? I really do not like going to school. I really do not like that school-life. It is just a banal routine.. boring.. And to think of what is coming ahead of us, I am just triggered.

WHY is everything so scary. I feel like I am living a nightmare. And my parents have so high hopes on me. Can someone assure me that I will live up to it? Usually, I could feel the presence of the people whom I truely love in my life when difficulties come about. Today, I feel like I am left alone.

REALLY, I feel like crying. I used to be able to express myself so well. Today I am scared to do so. More importantly, the words are not there to help me. I want someone to always be there for me, holding me when the battles stand in front and laughing with me when the day shines. Someone who I can talk to and love. Someone whom I can trust. Someone who is not self-fish.

You see, in this urban world, everyone is just fighting for their future and their success that they forget heir identity-humans. They forget that their family, friends and all around are often hurt and need support. Life just becomes so meaningless when everyone is full of themselves. We are indeed forgetting our identity as one.

I dunno if anyone is hearing what I am trying to say OR anyone dares to respond to his post, but I know faddingingdarkness understands it pretty well.

New phones, new laptops, iPads, $$$, fame, results. What are all these? I dunno... I just feel that all these are overtaking our creation. Like all these are controlling us, overshadowing our power. Love, understanding, realisation, integrity. What are all these? Again, I dunno... Perhaps I just think that these values are drowning just too soon.

What are you ? What are you living for everyday ? What is your purpose ?

Is it just ," I want to be rich in the future. I want to be better off than everyone. I want to be the best" OR is it," I want to impact someone. I want to live meaningfully. I want to be seen for my humane behaviour".

I have no idea why I am posting about this now, but just came and I am just here. I hope this post will open at least one of your heart , or at least mine.

loves.

messenger of love..

2010-06-11T13:14:00.006+08:00

Smile, it will never cost a dime

Then why do I have to tell you every time

Smile is a magic, brings hearts together

With package of love which stays forever

Smile is a medicine, wounds it heal

Anger and hatred no more in the deal

To see someone smile, how happy it feels

Smile imprints our hearts with its love zeal

Smile spreads love- it’s a treasure

Smile- give and take without measure

It feels good to bring out a smile

Messenger of love, that’s your smile.

cup of tea?

2010-06-11T12:56:00.003+08:00

What can be greater than spending time with someone you love?

Today, I went to school to hand in my work. Met up with Vi. Then Vi asked if I wanna go have tea with her. So we went to Mac and had tea with hash brown. It was really nice, I always predicted spending time alone with someone you trust is just so nice. We spoke about almost anything and everything. NAME IT & WE GOT IT! Soon we realise that we finished our tea i like 15 mins and we actually spoke for 3 hours. It was really awesome, she told me things I never knew and I shared with her stuff she never knew. Just enjoyed the company.

Anyhow, during good times, time flies right???

Or so I think..

Soon enough we had to leave. Cant wait until Eclipse comes out! We are planning to go watch it together. I really enjoyed myself so much.

Tea never tasted sweeter.

Califronia Girls

2010-06-09T16:36:00.001+08:00

You must check this one out. Katy Perry's new song-California Girls.

I love it.

Eclipse

2010-06-09T16:29:00.003+08:00

FOR NOW

This is the only thing that I am looking forward to. Nothing else. Only Eclipse can make me feel great. Its get me so sophisticated and emotion al like I am melting in it.

CHOICE! YES, about making the right choice at the right time.

TEAM JACOB or TEAM EDWARD!

Both I love!

2010-06-09T16:23:00.002+08:00

So Anthony just showed me his dates for this league..

IT SUCKS!!!

My holidays are going to be banal without him.. Anyhow, I am indeed going to miss him so much. I hope he does not like get sick along the way or anything. Must be strong OK? I know he is going to have a bad bad jet-lag! and it sucks if you're having it over a month or so..! So just do what I said ok :)

Love ya lots and take care. We will be fine here, so no worries. Just be happy & we will be anticipating you back :)

xoxo

again..

2010-06-09T16:09:00.003+08:00

Unpredictable. I thought it was just fine. Told myself that this time, I am not letting it down again. Well, there was this part of me which insist that it is not going to be successful. Me being stubborn, didnt bother about this part of me. Now, that I seen it again, I realise.. maybe its right! It takes 2 hands to clap indeed. I am not going to say much..

Peace

JBieber-nesssss

2010-05-27T23:31:00.005+08:00

Justin Feat Usher with Somebody to love. JBieber's voice broke and he cant sound any better! The song is just NEAVENH! U get it?! If you dont , listen to it and you will know !!!

AND this is the live performance! OH MY !!! I AM FEELING CRAZY NOW! you should see the part near the end where he dances!(2.36)!! OH MY GOD!!!! OK ! THIS IS INSANE! I AM SO MADLY IN LOVE WITH JBIERBER!!! LIKE HE IS TOTALLY ROCKING IT !! its cooler than ever ! **&@@#$%^&&**(@@!!!!!

MUST WATCH!!!

And this is just so funny! I am laughing at 0003 alone! HE is so so funny ! LOL! LOL! LOL oh my... u must watch this! Dont miss it!!

AND LOL! haha LOL! i cant laugh any louder in this midnight!

Who says?!

2010-05-27T22:43:00.003+08:00

OH MY GOSH right! You must check out this video. Like I never thought Selena and Demi would get so crazy.. lol? Like ! ! ! I love them. Sometimes crazy-ness is just so fun ! And who say that they are not mature. COme ON ! You know you would like to get crazy someday. . away fom reality ! DARE TO!(its so not lame?)

BFF

2010-05-27T22:32:00.004+08:00

I have no idea, but these 2 girls reminds me of my friendship with 2 of my close girls friends. Like they have sour and sweet times that they share. But no matter what they both believe in their friendship and never gave up, never will! They even take time off their celeb life to meet each other once every week. Its just sweet to see them.

When I say it reminds me of 2 of my friends, its 2 extreme different secenarioes. Like when I think of one of them, I feel so .... because I know I have not been giving her enough and I know she deserves much more for always being there for me even when the world turns down on me. She spends so much of time with me and even neglects her needs for me. At times, it gets me really guilty. But I really love you..

When I think of the other, I cant deny just how much I love her.. But something is just not right though everything is right. I wish I has the words to explain. But I know if I say it, its going to be so harsh..so self-fish..so pain! So I shall not say.. I just wish that you know who you are and really help me out with this. If you think you cant, maybe its better we just go...go away.. I know you have done a lot for me and bene there for me too. But, lately, I just do not see the way I saw you once upon a time-i miss it badly..BOTTOMLINE: I am trying;I do not see you.

Moonlight

2010-05-27T22:22:00.002+08:00

OH !

I must tell you guys how much I have been reading lately! Be happy. LoL? Prasana is finally reading and is enjoying it .

I read a couple of books lately : Sarah and Him, Sex Scandal, Life happens, The Last Song, Eclipse. That's a lot ? LoL, for me at least.

Anyhow thanks Sandy for lending me The Last Song. I have got no idea how you know I wanted to read it so badly. Sometimes I wonder if you read my mind? ( too much of eclipse ) ! lol? I love that lady so much you know. She is like so unbelievable! OK, I shall not start about her, I will never end !

OH MY GAWD right? You guys must ! Its a demand ! Go and read Eclipse ! Its a masterpiece. Really! The ending is so sad, I was on the urge to cry. Really, I think I will cry when I watch the movie. My poor Jake . . . I'm so sorry for him :( but Jake is a strong boy, he will manage. I am somewhat praying Edward and Bella will divorce or something ! Haha.. I am just crazy. So last night, I opened my window so wide, admired the moon as I slept. I could see Jake's sad face all over me..

IMOBSSESSED!

2010-05-27T21:44:00.002+08:00

REASSURANCE, yes that is all I ask..

As much as you need it, I need it too. Every time I try, you make me see things I do not want to see. Sometimes it hurts me so much, sometimes it makes me just so angry. Fortunately, God has left me with many lovely people around me to be there for me and share some affection. Sometimes I wish I was in sec2-the life then was just so nice.. Love everywhere..

If you think I have a bad temper, then that shows you do not know me at all. . .I repeat YOU DUN KNOW ME! really, if I had a bad temper I wont even been msg-ing you anymore, talking to you in school or even being with you. . . I have been tolerating everything these years. . . Just do whatever you guys want because I am not caring.

I shall just be happy like always :) and continue loving those who deserve :)

2010-05-24T14:52:00.002+08:00

Am addicted to something...

But i hate it, im trying to break from it

No one knoe what it is.. only me and the guy above

Today , from now, this second,
Im going to nrreak free from this!

faddingindarkness, you must help me! You know me best!

Hosanna

2010-05-22T11:59:00.002+08:00

Ok this one is really new. I do not really watch Bollywood films often. But the latest movies are really amazing, like some are better than Hollywood stuff. CAUGHT MY ATTENTION. You guys should seriously check out this song. Its really very very nice. The scenery and the movement and the beat and the meaning. Its all nice. For those who do not understand its basically about this Indian-Catholic girl(Hosanna, her name) and this Indian guy. They like each other. But the girl's father is very strict. So what happens in the end is for you to see.. Its not that ordinary a movie. Very edgy and unexpected. Sweet.

PTM

These boysss.....GAGA!

2010-05-22T11:32:00.003+08:00

Hi this is a video of JBieber singing on American Idol last Thursday! Its really sweet and WOW! His smile at the end is just god-like-my entrance pass the dreamland. Really really nice. Can also catch him playing rocking the drums! NICE MUST WATCH!

This is Greyson Michael! He is also another youtube star. He is getting darn famous with paparazzi. He sang it and lady gaga was so impressed, she called him and spoke to him. You should check him out. He is only 13?! yea man! TALENT we have here.

sweet.

2010-05-20T00:49:00.002+08:00

Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake.

(iwillbe)

CAN!

2010-05-20T00:08:00.003+08:00

Results are out!

Some of us would feel disappointed
Some will feel so happy

So long as you know you have worked hard, do not blame yourself for anything. Give yourself a pat and congratulate yourself. Sometimes when you motivate your inner-soul you will do much better. You can jump notches up through the strength you get through that.

If you think that this is just not your best, then always remind yourself that you are of greater capability. You must be aware that there are moments in life when your body,mind and soul will just slacken despite all the hard work. But, remember! Time is tick-ing!! Just do not let this exam demoralise you. Let this be an inspiration,let this make an impact!

So lets take a short break(go for a show or something) and get back to the path.

PTM

going..

2010-05-17T22:10:00.003+08:00

And I was just about to say bye to blogger for tonight but I saw something...

Damn...

I am still wondering, where has the years gone to? and what does all these mean?

Like its so easy for someone to over-shadow..

And I cant let someone over-shadow you?

That is just unreasonable...

really...

you make me so sad..

not angry-pure sadness..

again I feel like I am loosing you..

Its so routine now..like numb?

I have been holding onto this for years..

but just these small things make me wanna let it go!

Self-fish OR Love? (dunno..)

Now, I do not feel like seeing tmr at all!

just made it worst!

2010-05-17T21:41:00.002+08:00

DANg!

School again!

You know I used to loved going school-like it was the best gift! But nowadays, its like a curse to go school. I do not see any meaning in going school-probably the best is to earn big money! But money for happiness??!! It wont work for me-NOT ME! I feel so stress at school, I feel like someone is throwing bags and bags and lots of bags of burden over my head! HELLO! I need help! SOS! Damn...I haven't even packed my bag...Don't feel like!

Do I have a choice?....

Change

2010-05-17T21:12:00.004+08:00

And it's a sad picture, the final blow
hits you
Somebody else gets what you wanted
again
You know it's all the same, another time
and place
Repeating history and you're getting sick
of it

But I believe in whatever you
do
And I'll do anything to see it
through

So we've been outnumbered, raided and now
cornered
It's hard to fight when the fight ain't
fair
We're getting stronger now from things
they never found
They might be bigger but we're faster and
never scared

You can walk away and say we don't need
this
But there's something in your eyes says we
can beat this

Tonight we standed on our
knees
To fight for what we worked for all these
years
And the battle was long, it's the fight of
our lives
Will we stand up champions
tonight?

It was the night things changed, can you
see it now?
These walls that they put up to hold us
back fell down
It's a
revolution, throw your hands up,
'cause we
never gave in

Truth

2010-05-16T23:47:00.002+08:00

Just a simple word

With only 4 letters

Which look elegant in its ways

But it holds a great mass

With lots of situations ahead

Which is the reason for who we are

Have you found your purpose?

Have you found your meaning?

Have you found your satisfaction?

Or are you at least working towards it?

Do not give up on this thing-LIFE!

It is magical and precious!

Treasure it!

Live it!

2010-05-16T23:43:00.002+08:00

Yet another loss?

Be Happy where ever you are.
God bless you always foryour humble-ness and everything.

We love you, Malihah

2010-05-14T00:27:00.004+08:00

Guys I know some of you would be bored, can check out some of the videos I watch often ! They are really nice, hope you will enjoy them too! Ok I finally love Justin, but you can watch the last video and laugh at him! lol, he looks damn funny in there, like he didnt know what was happening and they were all like shouting! lol haha, got me laughing bad! Its normal yea, when artise do nothave common chemistry they cant sing together! LOL. And watch the one where taylor sings miley song!! ITs freaking funnae!!!! LOL! taylor is such an arse! lol! its damn funnny!!!!!!!!! Ok the parody are just damnnn funnny!!! OH MY GOD I CANT STOP LAUGHING!!! WATCH IT FOR YOURSELF!!!! Dave(the one who did parody) is GAY! lol! OH MY GAWD!!!!!!

2010-05-14T00:19:00.001+08:00

Cant wait to get my Justin Bieber Album soon!

Eclipse

2010-05-14T00:00:00.004+08:00

If the silence in my head lasted, I would never go back.

I wouldn’t be the first one to choose this form over the other.

Maybe, if I ran far enough away, I would never have to hear again…

I pushed my legs faster, letting Jacob Black disappear behind me.

Jacob Black

I cant wait for Twilight saga to continue with Eclipse.

I have been reading the book-its my heroine!

Hand in Hand

2010-05-13T23:53:00.001+08:00

Missing the times where we could walk freely

Times when I felt the breeze so easy

Life has overtaken our natural feeling

But I know wherever you are you're still my darling

IMY

Return of PTM

2010-05-13T22:13:00.005+08:00

HELLO WORLD!

wow! yes! YAHOOO!! HOLA!!!!

I finally can blog, can use the comp, can feel like a human! I feel so terrible that I have been missing out all the important parts of life because of reality, I mean the certs are the ones which speaks loudest right???

Well Well Well

This MYE I know its not my best, had been really ill and all(not an excuse though, just a promise I will do better the next time round yea?) Overall, I think AMath was the extreme killer this time? Haha..I mean the paper was ok, I didn't study, that's all! MY FAULT!

Also, I really miss many of my friends! I mean school friends too ok, I see them everyday, but its not them-perhaps the robot of them! So I kinda like miss them too. I realise I haven't spent time with MY Sandy, Dan and Anth! LOL! I know they called me several times, but I rejected because I knew I would not be able to concentrate when I spoke to them, it can take a day or so! EPIC!

AND my dearest Daniel, I am so speechless about you! I know I haven't been updating, but it is no reason for you to update for me! BUT, whatever! I mean its really nice, lol! I ADMIT OK! nice. The really memorable times..OH! I love the middle pic, when did you snap it man?! I didn't realise!

AND Anthony, erm..! I MISS YOU!!! You have been so GAWD DAMN BUSY! I wont blame you though, I was equally busy and you adapted to it. I should too! But every time I receive your text msges it just enlightens me no matter how down I can feel! You never fail to put a smile on my face :) Promise I will catch up with ya as soon as I can-hope you understand my situation too ya.

AND I have to do an ultra-scan on 24/5 and collect the results on 27/5 to check if there is anything serious happening on the inside of me. I have this crazy ambition of being a doctor and injecting everyone I meet, because I personally hate it when I have to go for appointments and always get injected! SICK.

AND tmr is chem SPA?! I haven't done anything! OH! yes, I am not planning to sleep today remember??? I slept the whole day!

AND I wanna watch movie! Someone pls hook me up for some nice movie! I am so desperate to go for some kick-ass show!

AND my fire is growing! I mean he is so HAWT ! lol. Now, I know TeeWay is going to say something like,"No one can be as seductive as me! Are you jealous Anthony cant be as seductive as me? OR say I am a hunk!" *SPeEcHLesS mE* lol! Ok TeeWay you are hot ok! In my list anyway, that is good enough!

YAY! I feel better after saying all that I wanna say! I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!

PTM

Fate,Faith,Future

2010-05-12T22:00:00.002+08:00

I kinda just finished my project! yahoooo me. lol, this sem, i am doing photography. So we have certain topics to capture on and edit Topic is : Fate,Faith,Future.

Pras and Anth have got an awesome chemistry going on and it is just so beautiful-moments of life I have to capture. Anyway, we also miss each other lots. Anth is down with many investment and seminars, Pras with her exams and I with my mid-term project as well as mentoring the junior boys. SO we haven't met, I hope these pictures bring memories & love back.

Let me explain to you this picture(from top-left,clockwise) :

1. When Anthony was thinking about ways to propose to Prasana and convince her. This was at his room. Oh! I remember the air con was at 16degrees & we were complaining of warmness.

2. New years day, after Prasana went out with her friends, we met. Then, she was leaning against the lift and Sandra took this picture. Then, Anthony was like,"oh crap! i cant resist temptation anymore!". lol, dude i just let the cat out, I'm sorry. Pras, I guess you never knew that.

3. Anthony was laughing when I tripped over Prasana and we both fell flat on the ball-ground. Prasana was like,"Bitch you! Can you come and help us and not laugh! Its not funny you know,pain!!!". I was like,"Hey bro, your turn will come! Now, get me up you arse!" haha, I remember how much Anthony laughed till he cried(rare!)

4. This was after Halloween 09' aka anth's bday aka anth 3rd failed attempt is getting his love(pras is kinda stubborn at her decisions, same as Anth-fated!)

5. OH! That was when Anth got scolded in front of the whole team for not wearing a head-band for practice after many reminders. He had to do 250 push ups, 10 rounds around court and 20 chin-ups! WITHOUT STOPPING. Pras was playing, but she could not concentrate and i noticed it!(caught ya!) she kept turning to look at him. Poor, Anth laid straight onto the ground after everything & he was crying because it was so pain. Until now, he never forgets his head-band. At least his girlfriend reminds him whenever she can!

6. LOL! This is epic!!! Pras and I were video conferencing while she was studying for her social studies exams and I asked her to smile while studying because she looked so serious. Then, every time she smiles, she will end up complaining so much, I told her she sounded better off without smiling. AND SHE STARTED LAUGHING FOR I DUNNO WHAT!!! LOL!!!

7. Anth at the gents @ downtown after we all went Wild Wild Wet. LOL! We were cam-whoring together and it was damn fun. This was the first time we all went out together after 14/2/10(special day for the 2 of em')

8. Haha, Pras was like freaking desperate to sleep and Anth, Jake & I were singing in her room and she got damn pissed! It was damn funny! Ended up, we were singing 2 is better than 1 together. LOL! Oh, anyway that is how she looks when she is despo to sleep(NOT THE TYPICAL SLEEPY LOOK AT ALL!!)

9. This is the latest shot, this picture brings back emotional memories, so i shall be sensitive and not write. But it just shows true love,endurance and patience.

OK! So, i took really long to get this all done, pls comment(dun have to know me to comment! You just have to be a human! So, I know there are many people who tag on her blog often and do not know me, don't ave to be shy, you can comment too :)) and thanks Sandra for the pics - Ben and Jerry's binge on me!

Love always,
Daniel

pure pain..

2010-05-03T07:56:00.003+08:00

so here i am..

cant sleep.
cant stand it.

my stomach hurts so badly. I went to the doctor and he gave me some really ugly tasting medicine. 3 injections and a test tube full of blood..how terrifying? I could not study, neither could I do my homework. Everyone is asking me things about exam and I feel like a real looser..So in a weeks time, I need to go to the doctor again..He will see if need to do a scope(which is just so morbid, I don't want to do!) or maybe get a solution for this deadly pain..(food poisoning, gastric or cancer(which is unlikely-I say!)) I am so not ready for midyears and I do not feel like coming to school. Every one's brain is loaded with work, while mine is just pure pain..DAMN! hate this...will I even make it through midyear?

why?

my friend

2010-04-20T20:32:00.002+08:00

i ask myself...

why is everything happening so fast?
why cant we take a break from this scary game-LIFE?
why cant God read my heart?
why cant life be less painful?
why must someone love us so much & leave suddenly?
why am i so soft hearted?
why am crying in front of my laptop screen now?
why cant i concentrate?

WHY!

and myself tells me...

this is life.
there is a purpose for everything to happen
God has it all planned

what is success without failure?
what is life with no pain?
IT WOULD JUST BE BORING!

He knows how much pain he was going through
and He didn't want him to suffer so much

my friend, our friend has made us all
happy
proud
jovial
lovely !

he shared
joy
tears
pain
cheer
laughter
With us !

Most importantly, he made
the best of what he has
everyone proud of him
a good friend
a good bother
a good son
a good drum major
a good human !

Our friend saw all his talents at such a young age !

He is a survivor !

God loves him..that's why he had to go so fast..

continue to smile..

(someone say WE LOVE YOU!)

Goodbye!

2010-04-17T21:28:00.004+08:00

HELLO!!!

yahooooos! im so lol! happynsad..worriednNOT! ok whatever it is I ROCK :)

Ok anyway, Thursday it was freaking cool. Like the day was crap..boring as ever! Like 3 periods of Math and stuff..I hate it! But the end of school was just heaven in hell(my good friends should know what it means)! I was at the bus stop, then Zul & Ricky came by. So we took 53 to the east. Man! the 2 of them are like FUNNAE-i mean FUNNAEEE! lol, we were like practically laughing from the start to the end. It was so damn loovely. The best feeling one can ask for. Then we saw this old man watching porn in his phone! MAN! eeew.. Why do old man love watching porn? My guy friends better don't do that oK! So yea, LOVELY stuff! ( not the porn part i mean! The bus :) )

Anyway this will be my last post for the semester. I will not be blogging until I really cannot take it, feel like dying or something of that nature. I need to change gear to gear 3! I was at gear 1 all the time and someone scream, "PRASANA WAKE UPP!!!!" I am so going to own Olevels ok! I'm going to **** it upside down until it runs back to Cambridge screaming for help! Yea baby! DO NOT ask me why I am so lol crazy insane today,now! I am just very stressed! whatever!!

Laughing with the one you love is just sweet

2010-04-16T22:15:00.002+08:00

tomorrow is a significant day...

last official GB meeting...everything is happening so fast! realise June is coming so soon? I'm lost..Why is everything going so fast...I just wanna take a deep breath and want everything to slow down..just stop a while! Another 6 months and we will all be doing something else, moving away from each other..

I'm going to miss GB! Last time commanding tomorrow..The love, the togetherness, the laughter will all be missed by prasana..

Goodnight

The gift of a friend

2010-04-13T21:43:00.002+08:00

This post is specially for THENG WEI!!!! My darling!

Anyway, I just wanna thank him for being so tolerant and printing out all my notes.

Some are like 11 pages and he still does it!

When I offer him money he was like I'M YOU FRIEND!!

Sweet Guy!!

I love you !!

PS: Tee-Way, rmb what I said to you ok! Its a deal :)

2010-04-13T19:49:00.000+08:00

Love happens

2010-04-12T18:38:00.001+08:00

OFFICIALLY TOGETHER!!!

Yep, awesome pair!

They are made for each other-hopefully its happy ever after for them !

We'll Be A Dream

2010-04-11T01:44:00.003+08:00

This one is specially for all my loved ones.

Don't doubt of you are the one , because if you think you are, then you are!

This song is really beautiful and makes me laugh and cry, smile and frown.

Its very sweet!

I love you guys :)

MUST MUST WATCH OK!!! see the lyrics!!! the video not out yet!

When the lights go out
We'll be safe and sound
We'll take control of the world
Like it's all we have to hold on to
And we'll be a dream!

2010-04-11T01:39:00.002+08:00

Doing my work..its been 6 hours since i got off my chair! My back hurts..

I am also talking to my friends on the phone. They are lol! lame! All of us are tired, but just cant sleep-actually i can! Just that i cannot! (get what i mean??)

lol!

anyway good luck basketball boys. Your very first match tmr, just do your best! Its a team! Even without Anthony, you guys can do it! We all know that! Sorry i can't be there. Daniel, just relax bro! You are going to do perfectly fine. Just motivate one another and walk with your heads high, bold&brave.

I have to go and do more work now..

Must thank Tee-way for helping me print all my stuff. LOL thanks man :)

Loves

2010-04-03T00:26:00.002+08:00

bye..Ive decided...i dunno why!

but bye!

will miss ya lots!!!!

faddingindarkness i love you!

oh sad....

i really feel you are so dear to me, i cant leave u!

but something just says that we are going to loose connection for sometime..

pls keep him entertained while I'm gone !

MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE

2010-04-02T09:48:00.004+08:00

I suddenly thought of them. I miss them a lot. Like with them life would be much more better. I miss their songs. This was one of their best performance at their final concert in Mexico. Just check out the thousands of people who came and they were all crying when he sang this song. They just could not leave. Thanks MCR! i love you! and i therefore declare today that they are the best damn band in the 21st century!

Watch THIS!

YOU MUST OK! LISTEN TO THE LYRICS!!!

Hails MCR!

UPDATE!

2010-04-02T08:44:00.004+08:00
*stretches*

GOOD MORNING!

wow, I feel like a human again. Yesterday when I came back from school, I just changed into my PJs and went to bed(at 5pm). And I am finally awake now :) Like 15 hours of sleep! 2 days of sleep. Yea, this s how tired I am. However, I realised something good that is happening in me. Usually, when I am tired, I get grumppy and moody, people would feel like slapping me. But this time, I did not have any kind of mood swing at all! I am still so happy. I dunno why OK! Maybe because I am not a human anymore? LOL. I still get frustrated and all when I cannot do something, but I do not show it to the people around me. So that's good! OH YES! I must tell you guys this! You know, when I am very like very like very extremely happy for something i have no idea over(happens often when I am stress) this something else will make me feel so...so...i cant find a word! Its like soo..argH! LIKE!! MAN! sad..sad..and more of sad-ness..yea! But its much more terrible.

OK! AND I must tell you this also. yesterday it was about to rain. You know every time that kind of weather struck i really get madly happy. Its like, heaven you know! I dunno about you guys. So THE RAIN text-ed and everyone reacted HUMAN-LY! That's good! But this particular person struck me off OK! Like the very first time I got so angry and sad when THE RAIN was about to make HIS entrance. Like ! WTF La.. and only Vi realised it !!! I don't even know if I like THE RAIN anymore. BUT I definitely know I dun wanna talk to him anymore!(ithink..) ANYWAY the others are still loved!

SAY IMCRAZY NOW!

PTM :)

SCREAM

2010-03-29T21:41:00.002+08:00

I love this song all of a sudden

I see every part of youu in it

Get Well Soon

I always pray for you :)

ILY

2010-03-28T08:51:00.004+08:00

she
turns,
she smiles.
what is happening ?
she ask..
why is everything
changing ?
she
wonders..
but the love of
you,
just never
changed.

I LOVE YOU
PRASANA :)

RAIN on me

2010-03-25T15:47:00.002+08:00

Good or bad, what do they mean?
Watchin' the raindrops on the window screen;

To some they mean healing,
to some they mean life,
To some they mean trials,
to some they mean strife.

But everyone needs a good rainstorm or two
To help them out when they don't know what to do
Raindrops mean a storm on the way,

Or raindrops mean your sins washed away
Whatever the moment a raindrop will bring
Whatever the sacrifice raindrops will mean
The raindrops make showers in which we can sing!

ILOVETHERAIN -my best friend...

twilight saga feat, adam's broken pieces

2010-03-24T21:09:00.003+08:00

i feel like crying..
i dunno why..

i just miss you so much..

and im sorry for not being there,
like what im suppose to be doing..

i dunno why you are in me so much..
everything i do, i see you..

man!

THIS SUCKS!

im sad for something im not sure about..
ARGH!

i have goosebumps and
tears rolling down..

i wanna BIG hug from someone..

REALLY!

i just want to sit beside you..
stare at each other and just be silent!

thats the best reward..or medicine??
the silence between us is so self-assuring..

its like ... like .. like .

I DUNNNNOOOO!!!!!!!!!

ps iloveyu

2010-03-23T15:56:00.000+08:00
go away!

i wanna be!

just...

go away!

GAME!

2010-03-21T00:47:00.003+08:00

because when i put my mind on it;
i will do my best so i will happen

im not gonna waste another day in this town

They call it L.I.F.E

2010-03-21T00:23:00.001+08:00
hello folks!

OK you can see clearly that faddingindarkness.blogspot.com is badly molested by THE RED KING a.k.a MASTER OF THE BED a.k.a MY DOG a.k.a MY GOOD FRIEND.. OK the "a.k.a" can just continue when it comes to this individual. OK POLICE!!! can I claim a POP for my blog against mathias choo! ITS SO SEXED!! haha.. i miss him!

anyway the weather has been very beautiful. really amazing. love the rain and the wind and the wittered leaves in the pathway. how i wish you were alright and we can walk through the park and talk to each other. its soo beautiful you know.. just looking in your eye makes me feel so loved. i love you lots.

also, i realize that my grades have dropped LOTS! and i have to do something about this. Probably i am going to ask my parents to confiscate my phone so i will stop msg-ing for good! i dunno. but all i know is that i must do something about it. can you all please help me through this stress thing?! i suck at managing stress, at talking to people when they are crying and stopping myself from using vulgarities. I'm so frustrated i kept using lots of vulgarities. I NEED TO STOP! OK, i want to be alone in class and really quiet ! i hope i can maintain it! obviously, with tee-way, its a challenge for me! lol !

PTM :)

2010-03-17T15:19:00.001+08:00

"you broke it again...
EXPECTED."